"Yeah, I get it. You had good times with these assholes but they fucked it up and-" They let go of Héctor for a moment to vaguely wave. "There ain't anything wrong with telling people like that to fuck off but it's still a bitch when you remember there was something good there."
Ernesto is a prime example of that. His actions have irreversibly destroyed the friendship between him and Héctor...but it was a friendship none the less. Friends that loved each other like family. Hell, if Nekane wanted to dive into a place they didn't like going, they could say the same about their Handler.
They don't. But it's there.
"Putting lines in the sand is a good thing in the long run. As nice as you are it's good to have limits. And if you hit those limits than it's okay to tell someone to take a fucking hike."
But if later on Héctor wanted to rekindle those relationships that's fine too. Maybe Hell will freeze over before some assholes look at themselves and realize they're the problem, but there's a chance. Nekane trusts Héctor to know his own limits, even if he's slowly learning them along the way.
His own mind is going over faces; the ones who let go, the ones who could still. Love is a terrible thing. For all his romanticism of the romantic, what they said remains true. He feels the truth of it now.
He nods his head with what they say. And he thinks of he and Dodger's exchange.
"I'm scared to be alone."
"So am I."
He breathes a sigh.
"I think I'm afraid that, drawing lines, I'm going to end up alone. Like the price might be too high for anyone when what they get is...you know. Me. If I stop letting people back in, I'm not going to have anyone at all." And he doesn't know who he'll be then, if anyone at all.
That too Nekane understands. Because of their general attitude they don't have much in the way of close friends and even then there were times that the other party had to make it clear the detective crossed a line.
"I ain't advocating for you to be a dick twenty-four seven like me. It'd be shitty if you called off a friendship because the other person...I don't fucking know, breathed wrong or whatever. But..."
Gently they reach up to take his face in their hands, fixing him with a serious look.
"There is nothing wrong with saying you've had enough with shitty friends that use you like that. If you're not comfortable with something it's okay to speak up or say you don't want to do it. If they come back and apologize, and you still want to be friends? Cool. But you gotta let them know you won't put up with that shit again. Okay?"
And frankly people are stupid if they don't think Héctor is worth being with but that's something Nekane is keeping to themself.
He laughs a little at that. No, he doesn't think he could manage something like that, nor would he want to. He knows that's not what Nekane meant.
But, the worry remains.
The reach out to him, getting him to look up and meet their eyes. Sometimes, they make him feel so small. He blinks back a burn in his eyes and bobs his head.
"Okay," He says.
His arms go up. He reaches out for them, pulling them closer so he can slip his arms around their back and just hang on.
"Thank you."
He's glad, at least, he doesn't have to give them up.
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Ernesto is a prime example of that. His actions have irreversibly destroyed the friendship between him and Héctor...but it was a friendship none the less. Friends that loved each other like family. Hell, if Nekane wanted to dive into a place they didn't like going, they could say the same about their Handler.
They don't. But it's there.
"Putting lines in the sand is a good thing in the long run. As nice as you are it's good to have limits. And if you hit those limits than it's okay to tell someone to take a fucking hike."
But if later on Héctor wanted to rekindle those relationships that's fine too. Maybe Hell will freeze over before some assholes look at themselves and realize they're the problem, but there's a chance. Nekane trusts Héctor to know his own limits, even if he's slowly learning them along the way.
no subject
He nods his head with what they say. And he thinks of he and Dodger's exchange.
"I'm scared to be alone."
"So am I."
He breathes a sigh.
"I think I'm afraid that, drawing lines, I'm going to end up alone. Like the price might be too high for anyone when what they get is...you know. Me. If I stop letting people back in, I'm not going to have anyone at all." And he doesn't know who he'll be then, if anyone at all.
no subject
"I ain't advocating for you to be a dick twenty-four seven like me. It'd be shitty if you called off a friendship because the other person...I don't fucking know, breathed wrong or whatever. But..."
Gently they reach up to take his face in their hands, fixing him with a serious look.
"There is nothing wrong with saying you've had enough with shitty friends that use you like that. If you're not comfortable with something it's okay to speak up or say you don't want to do it. If they come back and apologize, and you still want to be friends? Cool. But you gotta let them know you won't put up with that shit again. Okay?"
And frankly people are stupid if they don't think Héctor is worth being with but that's something Nekane is keeping to themself.
no subject
But, the worry remains.
The reach out to him, getting him to look up and meet their eyes. Sometimes, they make him feel so small. He blinks back a burn in his eyes and bobs his head.
"Okay," He says.
His arms go up. He reaches out for them, pulling them closer so he can slip his arms around their back and just hang on.
"Thank you."
He's glad, at least, he doesn't have to give them up.