Nekane actually growls at Héctor's mention of not being afraid of a few bites. Maybe it doesn't sound threatening but he's not seen them cornered and afraid. If their shadows don't work, there's their illusions. If those are gone then there is themself.
All the way until they meet their end.
But they focus when Héctor keeps talking. He takes the advice Nekane has to heart but the rest is...well, they can see his point. If they don't talk then Dodger can make up whatever he wanted and that meant he had all the control. And God, they are not giving him that.
You too. And they give him a look. That's their stipulation. He has to tell them if the same thing happens to him.
But Nekane pauses at his next question. They know Héctor isn't going to like it. But they have to write it.
You know how that game works.
He wanted more then that. I said no so he pinned me. Said I should be grateful.
That I was only alive because of you. Otherwise he'd be cutting open my face.
They weren't kidding when they said Héctor was Dodger's excuse.
When he broke the mirror I used my illusions to blind him. Still caught me.
I did provoke him. Because Nekane wasn't innocent in all that. But keeping their mouth shut and letting Dodger have his way was never in the cards. That's all.
He hasn't seen them like that, no. But it's not like he hasn't been bitten before. Even if not to the same extreme. He lets the growl go all the same.
He bobs his head with those first words. It's fair. If nothing else, he thinks they both try to be fair.
"I can do that," He promises. Even if he knows it'll be easier said than done.
What follows is what he feared. It's what he thought, but put to words, it manages to gut him anyway.
It paints a terrible picture. He can imagine it vividly, a knife stuck in and prying Nekane apart like a jammed drawer. It's worse than Dodger simply getting handsy, something he's done and something Héctor could expect. This is threat, explicit. By the end, he shakes his head.
"I don't care if you provoked him. You were doing that all evening. You still never asked him to touch you. He could have told us to go. You came along to protect me in the first place. He tried to make offers a hundred times to look out for anyone I asked. Even if I didn't take him up it's obvious enough he knows he was wrong." He should've never brought Nekane along. He should have never gone at all. "He should've known better. And so should've I."
They tap the 'unpredictable' comment before turning the page.
Can't control people's actions. God knows I want to while working.
But can only predict it. Maybe if there was a promise he would have upheld it. Maybe not. Can still hurt people while upholding it. Not your fault that it happened. Only his because he chose to do it.
Okay to feel guilty though.
Because dismissing those feelings will turn him into something like them. Lying was a sin on their list only because it was a universal sin, not because they felt guilty about it. Choosing to not feel guilty about anything would be something like it.
Just don't beat yourself up forever. I don't blame you. You gave him a chance and he fucked it up. That's on him.
Not Héctor. He could ask Dodger to behave until his voice broke and the words were etched into the man's brain but it comes down to the person to change their behavior.
He frowns again at the tap to the page, but he can't argue it. They're right. He can't control Dodger. Or Ernesto. Or anyone else or even them for that matter.
As difficult as it all is to swallow, it helps too. He swallows down the ache in his throat and bobs his head to show he understands. Then, carefully, he slides closer.
"I'm glad you're alive."
He doesn't know what he would've done if Dodger had actually managed to kill them. This is already bad enough.
"I'm going to find you a scarf later. Something loose. You can cover up but still let the wound breathemore than your wrapping does. Is that okay with you?"
"I ain't about to kneel over if I can help it. Not to a shithead like him."
Maybe it's just a point of pride now, to keep denying Dodger their body and life because fuck him. And Nekane knows just how low they'd stoop just to spite someone.
They slowly lean into him, making sure they don't go so fast they get sick and completely ruin the moment. Not that they don't try to anyway.
"You ain't half bad either." Nailed it. "Find an ugly one. I wanna blind everyone that looks at it if I can't tie the bandages tight."
If it's a point of pride, he can't blame them. At this point, he's regretting that Dodger's known his body even more than he already had been. But then, his will is far weaker than Nekane's with just about anything but home.
It's a twinge in his heart when the move to him, filling the space. He tucks his iced hand close and reaches the other around them. And he laughs at their ever blunt words.
"Alright," He promises. He presses a kiss to the top of their head. "Bright, ugly, and breathable. I'll make sure of it."
Just as soon as they both deal with their hangovers.
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no subject
All the way until they meet their end.
But they focus when Héctor keeps talking. He takes the advice Nekane has to heart but the rest is...well, they can see his point. If they don't talk then Dodger can make up whatever he wanted and that meant he had all the control. And God, they are not giving him that.
You too. And they give him a look. That's their stipulation. He has to tell them if the same thing happens to him.
But Nekane pauses at his next question. They know Héctor isn't going to like it. But they have to write it.
You know how that game works.
He wanted more then that. I said no so he pinned me. Said I should be grateful.
That I was only alive because of you. Otherwise he'd be cutting open my face.
They weren't kidding when they said Héctor was Dodger's excuse.
When he broke the mirror I used my illusions to blind him. Still caught me.
I did provoke him. Because Nekane wasn't innocent in all that. But keeping their mouth shut and letting Dodger have his way was never in the cards. That's all.
no subject
He bobs his head with those first words. It's fair. If nothing else, he thinks they both try to be fair.
"I can do that," He promises. Even if he knows it'll be easier said than done.
What follows is what he feared. It's what he thought, but put to words, it manages to gut him anyway.
It paints a terrible picture. He can imagine it vividly, a knife stuck in and prying Nekane apart like a jammed drawer. It's worse than Dodger simply getting handsy, something he's done and something Héctor could expect. This is threat, explicit. By the end, he shakes his head.
"I don't care if you provoked him. You were doing that all evening. You still never asked him to touch you. He could have told us to go. You came along to protect me in the first place. He tried to make offers a hundred times to look out for anyone I asked. Even if I didn't take him up it's obvious enough he knows he was wrong." He should've never brought Nekane along. He should have never gone at all. "He should've known better. And so should've I."
no subject
Can't control people's actions. God knows I want to while working.
But can only predict it. Maybe if there was a promise he would have upheld it. Maybe not. Can still hurt people while upholding it. Not your fault that it happened. Only his because he chose to do it.
Okay to feel guilty though.
Because dismissing those feelings will turn him into something like them. Lying was a sin on their list only because it was a universal sin, not because they felt guilty about it. Choosing to not feel guilty about anything would be something like it.
Just don't beat yourself up forever. I don't blame you. You gave him a chance and he fucked it up. That's on him.
Not Héctor. He could ask Dodger to behave until his voice broke and the words were etched into the man's brain but it comes down to the person to change their behavior.
no subject
As difficult as it all is to swallow, it helps too. He swallows down the ache in his throat and bobs his head to show he understands. Then, carefully, he slides closer.
"I'm glad you're alive."
He doesn't know what he would've done if Dodger had actually managed to kill them. This is already bad enough.
"I'm going to find you a scarf later. Something loose. You can cover up but still let the wound breathemore than your wrapping does. Is that okay with you?"
no subject
Maybe it's just a point of pride now, to keep denying Dodger their body and life because fuck him. And Nekane knows just how low they'd stoop just to spite someone.
They slowly lean into him, making sure they don't go so fast they get sick and completely ruin the moment. Not that they don't try to anyway.
"You ain't half bad either." Nailed it. "Find an ugly one. I wanna blind everyone that looks at it if I can't tie the bandages tight."
Priorities.
no subject
It's a twinge in his heart when the move to him, filling the space. He tucks his iced hand close and reaches the other around them. And he laughs at their ever blunt words.
"Alright," He promises. He presses a kiss to the top of their head. "Bright, ugly, and breathable. I'll make sure of it."
Just as soon as they both deal with their hangovers.